On a sunny spring-like winter afternoon on the Western Slope of the Rocky Mountains ~

Over my 43 years in birth work, originally inspired by the birth of my daughter Molly (1970), I’ve been awestruck and humbled at what I continue to learn –what science, ancient wisdom, intuition and personal experience – show about what it means to be born, to give birth…and how to be fully human. I’ve discovered that there is irrefutable evidence that the childbearing continuum, that series of exquisitely complex, processes that take us from before conception through birth, and then through the first year following, shows just how interdependent everything is. Remember how we heard that a butterfly moving its wings somewhere on this earth is affecting life across the planet. That was such a beautiful image; but it’s not just a metaphor for the interconnection – AND inter-dependence – of life. If we live with this awareness, life opens up to so much richness.

I hold this truth about the interconnectedness and interdependence of life as something precious. It reminds me today, when I have been impatient, irritable and frustrated with life’s daily challenges, that it’s up to me to re-work my attitude and behavior so that I what I give out to the world is the best of me. And I’ve been pondering this truth as I reflect on what appears to be a growing movement globally for people to be uncivil, mean, and bigoted to each other…and violent in thoughts and speech, as well as actions. As someone who’s chosen the path of activism, I continue to be stunned at how I think, feel and behave when I run across examples of human meanness…my own included.

A few examples in the news of the past few days:

1)   The refusal of governments to make climate change, global warming and the toxic effects of our addiction to oil the number one priority to address locally, nationally and globally…or we won’t have a livable world

2)   the efforts to suppress homosexuality by passing laws to outlaw it or making it legally acceptable to refuse to serve or work with those who are not “straight” (Is anyone really 100% straight?);

3)   2) the ongoing attempt to deny science and scientific inquiry and methodology by taking the subject of evolution out of school books, or putting creationism (a set of untestable religious beliefs) alongside it in curriculum;

4)   the attempt to keep other people from earning a “living wage”: by legislating a minimum wage that will allow an adult to work no more than one fulltime job in order to be able to afford decent housing, food and transportation);

5)   the ongoing refusals by corporations to change practices that have known (scientifically proven) negative impact on their workers and the public’s health and children’s brain development… I can point specifically to substances such as dioxin (one of the toxic ingredients in Monsanto’s Roundup herbicide) that send a false message throughout our body because they mimic our natural hormones, and for this reason are named “endocrine disruptors”.

6)   the attempts by many to keep healthcare and access to enough food and healthy food a privilege that only a few deserve to have, rather than a right that everyone deserves and every society needs to make possible

Need I go on! The list is just beginning in my mind. How can so-called religious people, God-loving people, think it’s acceptable to try and prevent others from having the same rights and access to care and caring and being treated with respect and kindness that they enjoy.

Today, at the start of yoga class, when the teacher suggested that we each set an intention for the class and perhaps for the day, I made my intention to have that hour of practice be there to help me be more patient and have more equanimity. I like that word: it brings up a sense of wellbeing as well as good-natured calm. But, as my partner Bob and I were discussing last night, practicing patience (and forbearance) and equanimity (what Vietnamese monk Thich Nhat Han suggests is helped along by lifting the corners of our mouth into a soft inward smile whenever we think about it) doesn’t preclude feeling anger. Especially for those of us who care deeply about one or another pressing issue.

There’s so much in the world – and being reported in the media – that Bob and I feel deserves our being outraged… and then doing something about it. Focusing our outrage and indignation – our anger – like a laser and letting it fuel clear thinking and direct action is a good thing, don’t you think? And I for one, hope to inspire or remind others to get engaged in this world.

I’m reminded frequently of the paradox of holding both a sense of outrage and peace of mind (equanimity).  They’re needed equally and in equal measure. I have a lot of practicing to do to achieve this balance I yearn for. And at the same time as working toward it, I have to remember that loving kindness starts with being kind to myself.

As an self-appointed “agent of change”, I struggle to accept the world as it is right now, and accept myself as I am, which I do believe is the proper starting place for anyone who wants to help create a better world. Sound ironic but it’s not. It’s just one of the many paradoxes of life: paradox being two or more things that seem as if they cannot both be true, yet they are.

I find that going outside and being in nature is an immense help to the over-thinking brain, and overwrought emotional body: noticing how my body is feeling, noticing that I'm actually "in" my body, noticing how amazing it is to be alive and a part of all that is.  It reminds me that the world of nature, of which we are a part, is in a dynamic state of balance, when we are willing to allow it and for the most part leave it alone. Being observant and curious as well as enjoying being present in it, that's another paradox worth cultivating. 

And there is more and more evidence that we humans are by nature kind, generous, moral and that we turn toward doing good (remember the words of ML King, that the arc of human nature is long but it tends toward goodness, to paraphrase). 

And there's new scientific evidence that even as young babies, as young as a few months, we have can tell the difference between something harmful and something beneficial, and that we generally choose what is good. That’s something I’ll write another blog about sometime…the innate goodness of human beings, and how our work can maximize that.

Sending love, Suzanne Arms

What do infant mortality and elephant poaching in Africa have in common?

Plenty. Researchers have, for the first time, observed a direct connection between elephant poaching in Africa, and poverty, as expressed in high rates of mother and baby deaths in humans.

This is just one of many examples of how life on this earth is so richly complex and interdependent. It’s awe-inspiring. This year my focus overall is going to be to get as many people and organizations as possible to understood that birth and the Primal Period (pre-conception to the child’s 1^st birthday) is the nexus point, or center, of everything…whether or not we understand it to be so. Why? Because the problems facing humanity and this earth require a good number of people actively involved in finding solutions for humanity’s heavy footprint.  Shall I list the big ones: climate change; environmental toxins; which are killing off whole species and even found at high levels in breastmilk and the cord blood of newborns; the ongoing abuses of women and children and vulnerable populations; and overpopulation.

I’m always on the look out for good news, to counter my tendency to see the underbelly. Here’s a piece of good news I came across…If every woman alive today was to have just one child, the population of the world would drop to a mere 1.9 billion by the turn of the next century. Think of it, and of how many of our problems would be lessened if there were just a lot fewer humans. 

So, back to my main point, that it all begins with birth. Making it possible for people to be healthy happy, creative and involved – in short, thriving, means they start life and brain/body development off on the right foot, getting all of their needs met. We need young people, adults and elders who are not so pre-occupied with coping that they have no energy or time to get involved. And that leads us back to birth, because we need a good number of babies and mothers whose bond has not been damaged by high levels of stress and/or trauma. This is what it takes for babies to develop fully in the primal period and for mothers to parent with a sense of confidence and ease. I’m wanting to see thriving, not coping.

I feel happy that more and more people and organizations are using the term “mother-baby” rather than mother and baby. Because they really are one, symbiotic and inter-dependent system. What we do – or fail to do for one of them – we are also doing to the other. Here lies brain development and consciousness of the next generation:  in how we treat women as mothers.

I believe it’s time to get everyone in this loose-knit international grassroots “birth movement” to transform birth to understand that this primal period literally is the key to whether or not we human beings develop and live out of a core senses of fear and defense … or love and trust. It’s that basic, because how the baby in the womb (pre-nate, if you will) senses the world to be – safe or unsafe – determines how it organizes it’s billions of cells, organs and entire body and mind for its lifetime.

I maintain, and my whole life affirms this to be a truth, that we humans have been the aggressive, anxious, and destructive (and increasingly self-destructive) creatures that we are, because we and our history are rooted in trauma. Unresolved trauma… Lots of it.

Think of it: from conceptions that are unplanned or unwanted, and our mothers being under great stress when we were growing inside them, to being born in traumatic ways and then separated from our mother, not breastfed (or not for long enough), not picked up when we cried, nor held and slept with and “worn” long enough…to living in families full of secrets and lies and un-grieved griefs, and often raised to feel shame about ourselves and our natural feelings and instincts. Then there is the history so many families the world over, have…generations of unhealed historical trauma (famine, war, slavery, annihilation, dislocation from homeland …).

I say it’s time to break the long chain and cycles of suffering and trauma and wake up into who we really are. We humans are really amazing creatures, capable of so much more. Think about all that humans have accomplished despite carrying anguish in their hearts. How much more could we be, if we had the chance to grow (develop) fully, as nature/God/Allah intended! Wow!

I don’t know about you, but I’m sick-to-death of war and making enemies of people and seeing good midwives arrested and babies and young girls and boys having their genitals mutilated, or kids and girls being treated badly or sold into slavery or abused in other ways, including by their family.

I’m so excited about the various movements on the planet… grassroots movements all of them… to bring about equality and justice and compassion and end greed and domination.

Next month on February 14^th (Valentine’s Day in the USA) we’ll see another outpouring of women – and good men too – around the world, celebrating and dancing in the streets to same dance, and singing, and YES, demonstrate, that women will no longer tolerate being abused. That’s One Billion Rising (onebillionrising.org). Find a group in your community and learn the simple dance and get out there in the streets on February 14^th! We owe it to women and children and men everywhere.    Love, Suzanne

How do we create a sense of ease and gracefulness as we work

me, in Tenerife, Canaries, between sessions

Today started out smooth but soon turned into overwhelm. Here's the situation that I see many people who are being activists (for any cause) face...We are pulled in so many directions at once. Should I go on facebook and go through people who want to be friends and say yes and then look at comments and respond to each one...or should I make write a new blog post...or should I make phone calls (especially because I'm someone for whom phone calls are 2nd best to face-to-face...and emails just don't carry the nuances that I want from a conversation...or should I do some work on planning the next, in my case, Roundtable for the project I'm on...or should I make phone calls to people who've supported Birthing The Future in the past and see whether they want to become members for the year or give a donation...or should I just go to the gym sit in the greenhouse and go through the strawberry plants and find ripe strawberries to eat...hmmm.

The dilemma for myself - and many of you - is how do we control the input of stuff coming at us while, at the same time, using our gut/intuition to prioritize the day and respond to just what feels necessary to respond to. I read once that 2 of the most high stress jobs are not the ones you ordinarily think of, such as fire fighters and surgeons, but secretaries and chefs/cooks in a restaurant. Why? Because they do not have control over what comes at them. Other people have control over their attention and time...Of

at a Birthlight Conference in England

course, I'd put mothers (or fathers doing real full-on fathering) in this category..."plate jugglers", an elder wise woman friend in the birthing movement in England told me decades ago. That's what mothers do. The problem is, babies, young children, and our own soul, don't operate at the same speed as our mind. They move and respond slowly...mmm.

Pause...breathe...go outside and sit in the greenhouse and pick through the strawberry plants for ripe red berries. Yum...did that. That helped...Then came back in and put on some Lavendar oil (I find Young Living the best of all oils and can contact me if you want to know why...suzannebirthing@gmail.com), couldn't find Peace and Calming. Took several homeopathic Calm Forte too. My nervous system was just too "up-leveled" from working with Sam, my intern to learn more about facebook and working with it.

Molly and Kinjah a few years ago

It's quiet. Sam had put lovely jazz guitar music on but I couldn't take the pace of it, so she's working with
 interns. That's one of the differences between myself and my 16 year old grandson, Kinjah and his friends (he and Molly, his mom, live with me) and Sam and my generation. They seem to be able to run at a higher frequency and speed as they multi-task. I can do several things at once, but I get quickly overwhelmed by new things to learn...

Breathe...stand up and stretch a few yoga stretches...Yes...mmm. did that...

Just to remind myself that
winter's over at my place...

It's a beautiful spring day, yes, spring at last. Our last snow was 10 days ago!  I'm blessed with so many good things and I'm thankful, always. So no complaining, Suzanne...I have enough food to eat and I can get up and walk away from this computer whenever I want, assuming I remember to and can tear myself away from whatever task I'm involved in.

So...here's the thing: not only do we need to find some way to select that which we pay attention to and that which we don't, but we who are working in activism need to pace ourselves since we're usually not getting paid. This morning my small social security check arrived and it was short $110, because they went and mistakenly took out that amount to cover Medicare deduction (it's a monthly thing but I'm not supposed to pay because my income is low)...so call the social service office, leave a message and then wonder, Do I cross that item off of my list of things to do today or not, since I haven't actually spoken to the woman in charge and don't even know whether she'll get my message...

What I do each day bears no resemblance to the money that comes into the nonprofit. I learned that long ago, working for myself, as I've been doing since 1975, when Molly was 5 - except for a 9 month stint as a freelancer with a research company...Truly, the money that comes in is in no way connected to the output of work I do. So I have to remind myself fairly regularly to reach out to those who do support Birthing The Future to tell them I need something.

Ah yes, speaking of need. My donated (to the nonprofit) wonderful 1992 Honda is really on her last legs. The driver's side window won't roll up or down, it just hangs there, half in and half out, kitty-whampus-like. No fun when I'm driving at any speed over 40 or when it rains or snows. And this weekend I'm driving the 3.5 hours up to Crestone, Colorado, at the foot of higher peaks, 9,000 feet, to work with Rick, my editor friend on putting together the loose "script" of assembled great clips from the film project. So what to do about this windown and, bigger yet, my sweet car, whose previous owner, from India, named her Lakshmi....

DOES ANYONE KNOW OF A LOW GAS CONSUMPTION FINE CAR TO GET OVER MOUNTAIN PASSES WAITING TO BE DONATED TO A NONPROFIT, FOR A TAX DEDUCTION? Sorry, I didn't mean to yell! Do let me know if you know someone with a car for us...

Back to where I left off.  So, practicing making the days flow more gracefully, by attending to a few things and not trying to do anything I don't need or want to...of course, the phone rang and I needed to pick it up because it's Ali, one of our housemates. Sure enough, her sweet doggie got cut up on barbed

Our irrigation "ditch", flowing
once more...and the dark
beneath the light.

wire swimming in the irrigantion ditch behind the house, and she's off to the vet to get it sutured and asked me to take out the garbage to the street, cuz the truck's about to come and she forgot...LIfe...
Pause...breathe...drink a glass of water, not sips, most of the glass. It's so easy to dehydrate at this altitude....Done!

You might take a few sweet moments to sit somewhere lovely and consider the question: How do I prioritize what is truly important for me to respond to or do, from what seems urgent, from what niggling little things need to be done and you might as well get them out of the way now...

me, on a beach on the California coast

So much of my life is about connections to people - creating, supporting, maintaining, re-connecting when I've lost touch...and I follow the principle of serendipity, that things come into my life at the right time and for a reason, though I may not know what the reason is at that moment. Working from intuition and following outside cues of things that arrive on my doorstep, in my email box, on my facebook accounts - both my personal one and the Birthing The Future one...I have to quickly assess, Do I handle this or that right now or put it aside. And, if I choose to put it aside, where do I put it, which pile? Get my drift?

Because we're still little kids
who love, and need, to play

So, with that, I'll end this blog entry, my second ever. I'm going to lie on the floor and do a little more yoga stretches and twists and breathe and then go back to working alongside Sam on finding the very best clips from the filmed material from Tenerife...because she leaves tomorrow morning and I want to have a rough assemblage of bit and pieces from the interviews to bring up to Ricks to string a very loose rough cut together...to which, after it's really edited down and everything is in the right sequence, we'll add still photos, blank screens with written text, music...That I love...the creative part.

because the flowers remind us...

Til next time, I leave you with the thought that there are millions of us across the world who, at this very moment, are working on behalf of what needs to be done - small and large - on this planet, in our community, in our family...in our own life and for our own precious body.

We are not alone, not ever...of course, spiritually that's true. But also in terms of the work we do in the world. Remember that. And remind me, when I forget. There's always nature...there's always our breath...and the paradox of how small and insignificant we humans are in the grand scheme of life working along at it's own perfect pace...and how important each one of us is, paradoxically.

Love, Suzanne
Durango, CO

A Day Off

Country lanes...my favorite places to walk

Bob, my beloved, suggested - strongly! - that it would be a good idea to take a full day away from creating havoc (I mean social change) in the world the way I do on a daily basis...

Okay, so he twisted my arm and got me to take off this morning in our jeep for the high country, Silverton, Colorado.

The road up to Silverton from Durango CO

What did I take with me? 1) Picnic foods (mmm, jarlsberg cheese, crackers, fruit, cups of hot tea and coffee and homemade scones that Molly (my daughter, who lives on the property with us, along with my teenage grandson) made this morning and were still hot when we took off. 2) layers of clothes, since it might be hot and it might be cold and it surely would be windy by afternoon in Siverton, at 10,000 feet in the mountains.

Spring Meadow, Leaving Durango

What did I leave behind? First, my list, which I make either every evening or first thing in the morning over a cup of tea. Second, work of all kinds, including making and answering dozens of phone calls, emails, writing and editing, going through photos, transcribing interviews from the professional filming I did at the Tenerife Roundtable...arranging my next Skype call to one or another of the participants on 4 other continents...I left thoughts of the "Primal Period", and how what happens to humans during that time from preconception to the 1st birthday, and my preoccupation with how those experiences, and especially the mother-baby bond, shapes our lives...shapes families...and even shapes society.

One of the last steam trains,
arriving in Silverton CO

He was right, you know. A day off in the mountains was just what I needed. It's not that I'm a Type A personality - no, I won't cop to that. I love to play, be silly, laugh, read, take walks down country roads near where we live, cook and share great meals, watch movies, play scrabble with Molly and Kinjah...and I don't work all day long and into the night. But I will plead guilty to being a touch driven about the idea that it's possible to transform birth in the world, if enough of us just care enough to do something about it.

Historic downtown Silverton,
10,000 feet high

Sunscreen, a must at this altitude for an auburn-haired lass with Russian-Irish heritage and a melanoma history. I remembered that, but forgot the water. Even at 7,000 feet, where we live, it's so easy to get dehydrated. And both Bob and I forgot to bring water. Bad idea in the mountains, where you can be seriously dehydrated in an hour and your body won't even tell you!

We took Bob's jeep: noisy, bouncy but perfect for a 4-wheel drive road when we get to Silverton. The drive to Silverton from Durango is magical, especially in spring and fall. And at this altitude the leaves on the birch and aspen are just beginning to emerge. There's nothing much to do in Silverton but walk and look at the mountains and feel the clean air. It was windy. We took a side road and had our picnic. Then drove back to town for a latte before taking off back home. I didn't think about work for 6 hours and didn't make one "to do" note until we entered Durango. What a great day! What a life! It's easy to make me happy.

Back at my desk, I'm planning the next Birthing The Future Roundtable Retreat, a dialogue among 21 women and men from around the world, which will be in the U.S. in August. If you want to know about this project, called THE TIME IS NOW, write me:
suzannebirthing@gmail.com. I'll send you details about how we are launching a global movement to transform how we bring humans into the world and care for every mother-baby and you can be involved. In the meantime, do check out the Birthing The Future website, and Facebook.

Hoping your day is full of sweetness and enough nature to remind you how beautiful this world is.
Love, Suzanne